Gimme some sugar, baby

I try not to watch "reality" television because most of it isn't real. Oh, and the people are so irritating I want to bitch slap them many, many times...with a heavy object. Unfortunately, I was sucked into the cesspool called "Celebrity Detox". Yowza, what happened to Jeff Conaway? He's become my poster boy for everything I never want to be - pain meds are scary stuff. He's convinced me that I don't need to climb the pain medication ladder to the OxyContin top rung. I think I'll stay here on the first two steps with Neurontin and be happy. Some of the other freaks from "Celebrity Detox" I've seen on teasers for different reality shows in the past. They don't interest me. Only Jeff does.

The thing with pain meds is that when you have chronic pain, you really need the meds to take the edge off. Chronic pain is so difficult to control, though. It's like a seesaw - trying to find the perfect balance so that you don't become a blithering idiot like Jeff.

I spent most of last year completely medicated. I slurred my words, said the same thing (always in 3's), forgot words, slept the day away - but I didn't feel the pain. It was still there only I didn't give a shit because I was in lala land. It was a good visit but my visa expired in July '07 and I don't think I'm going to go back. If I have to feel pain, so be it. I'd rather be in pain then totally out of it - and peeing on myself...or vomiting everywhere...or screaming for pills...or having a seizure...no, thanks. I'll take a chocolate cupcake and go whimper in the corner.