Saturday, October 04, 2008

Emotional Succubus

Once again, I'm surprised at how long I've been away. Did ya miss me? To be honest, I didn't even think about my blog for the past few weeks. I've been so swamped with my home project that time slipped away.

Now, let's dish. I have to tell you guys that it is always fascinating to me when someone I know changes. For better or worse, I like to watch the show. A few years back I worked with a young woman who seemed normal (notice I used the word "seemed")and seemed (again!) to have her act together. We were casual friends, didn't really hang out but talked during work hours. Then my "accident" happened and our friendship shifted. I blame all the drugs I was taking for my blurred reaction to her personality morph. Or maybe she was always like that but because I really needed all the support I could suck in, I got suckered. But once the drugs stopped, the freak show curtains were lifted and I had the only front row seat.

Emotional meltdowns, irrational acting out, too much "Eeyore" and not enough "Tigger". With everything that has happened to me, I certainly don't have the patience to listen to someone whine about how she is the victim of tyranny, or, as she puts it, "abuse". Riiiight. No matter how many hours (believe me, it was HOURS) I tried talking her down from the ledge, nothing worked. Then it hit me - she LIKED the ledge. She ENJOYED the drama. If everything in her life was smooth, she needed to create a hailstorm, with her at the center, taking all the stones. She can't appreciate the good stuff and has to lament the bad - and never is life simply good. The worst part is that she refuses to see that she creates her own drama. She thinks that she has every right to react emotionally, lash out and then claim the other person deserved it because their behaviour was wrongly directed at her. I don't know if this is an official diagnosis but she has what I term, "Junior Police Officer" syndrome. She wants to correct a stranger's mistake and teach them a lesson. Really? Who voted her Hall Monitor?

How do you deal with the black emotional hellhole that she has created? I can't dump her because, frankly, I'm scared to do it for fear of stalking. Believe me, it's happening now. How many times in a single day does a person need to call, email and text me? I'm waiting for her to show up at my parent's doorstep. She does know where I live. I need to disconnect from her. Each time we talk, unless I can keep the conversation to a "stroke her ego" conversation, I hang up the phone emotionally drained. Again, in my defense, I was so doped up I didn't even notice before. Frankly, I think half the time I was completely stoned and let her ramble aimlessly into her emotional forest of dead trees. Seriously. If there's life in there, it's choking.

Wow. Did I need to vent or what? I have to stop before she drags me completely under. By the way, I've suggested counseling, drugs and exercise. The doctor recommended drugs - nope. Counseling - nope. Exercise, eh, we'll see. How can you help someone who won't help herself?

Anyway, life for me is good. I'm in a great place. Health is steady, lots of activities planned, trips are booked - I'm moving forward. Have a great weekend!


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